Ohh, it's the deep burn. Oh, it's so deep. Oh, I can barely lift my left arm.Why, you ask? Patience... So yesterday was Jeremy's wedding. I was the best man. That's right, the best. Being the best man means I have a lot of responsibilities. Things like not losing the rings for the ceremony, chauffering people around, and giving a speech/toast at the reception. Well, I didn't lose the rings, and the speech went over very well.
But why does your arm hurt, you ask? Well, the day before at the rehearsal, I noticed one of the bridesmaids was rather cute. (No, I don't have pictures.) I noticed her looking at me at times, but that's only because I was looking at her ;) She actually introduced herself first. Yes, I was too shy to say the first word. But after that it was cool. I now knew her name, how she was related to Kaleena, and some other random things. Great! The door was open. So the next day at the reception, after we were done eating, mostly everyone got up to get drinks, talk to family, etc. Everyone but me and Andi (short for Andrea). So I got up, walked over to her, sat down and started talking. It turned out we had a lot in common. We danced a lot, talked a lot, and walked around when her foot got a cramp. I know how bad that hurts, I get them randomly also. It sucks.
Seriously, why does your arm hurt, Kevin? Ok. It was time for the bouquet and garder toss. The girls were first, and the bouquet kind of fell into Andi's hands. I knew what I had to do. I had to get the garder, no matter what. I got in front of the pack, and Jeremy flung it. It went straight to the ground and I dove. I skinned my elbow, rather badly, and my knee. But I got the garder. But then the DJ was like, "Oh no. What was that? That wasn't a toss. You have to do it again." I fell to the floor in exhaustion and had to give the garder back to Jeremy for another toss. So I got up, got back in the front, and waited. Jeremy tossed it again, this time in the air. There was one guy who got in front of me and was about to grab it out of the air. I couldn't let that happen. I lunged forward and stuck out my arm as far as I could. I wish I had a slow motion video of this. As the garder descended, he stuck out his hand. It was within three inches of him when my hand extended about two inches past his (the wonders of being tall with long arms). The garder hit my fingers, I closed them, and brought it back to my side. Finally! I finally got it for good.
So now the fun part. Andi had to sit down and I had to put it on her. The music started and I knelt down. She moved her foot back and forth to throw me off, which it did. But once I caught her foot, I started the ascent. Jeremy informed me that since he used his teeth to take it off of Kaleena, I had to use my teeth to put it on Andi. I started with my teeth, soon realizing that wasn't working all that well. So I switched back to my hands and slowly inched it further and further. I told her I'd go as far as she'd let me. As I got closer to her knee, the chair was in the way. So she moved her leg a little. I got a little further and her legs were then too close together, so she shifted again. When it was all said and done the garder had found its way about half way up her thigh. Well that was funtastic! But the night wasn't over.
Well, actually it was, and it was time to clean up. Andi and I helped clean up all of the centerpieces and when we were done with that, we were asked to be on kid duty. Charlotte, Jeremy and Kaleena's daughter, needed to have some play friends while everyone else was working away. So for the next 45 minutes, we played with her. Everyone I chauffered to the reception had other ways of getting home, so I was by myself. But I was also there with Andi, so I offered to take her home (or at least where she was staying since she doesn't live around here). Once Kaleena's mom took Charlotte, Andi and I ventured off into the night.
But was the night over? I don't think so. Through a few wrong turns, I managed to get Andi back to Kaleena's mom's house. I don't know the area, so sue me. When we got there, Kaleena's mom was unpacking the van, so I offered to help. Andi and I grabbed the stuff we could and made the first trip. By the second trip, Jeremy and Kaleena showed up. I was handed Charlotte so they could continue unpacking. Andi, on the other hand, now had Aurora to watch. So we were both on kid duty again. That was cool. We went inside and started playing with them again. One good thing is that we both like kids, so this wasn't too bad. But as I was on my way in, Kaleena said to me, in that stern, don't be a typical male, voice, "She's my cousin... I've known her since we were this big." I smiled and went inside. Eventually, Kaleena's mom got Charlotte's bottle and she started to fall asleep. It appeared my baby duty was done. So I got up, said my goodbyes, gave Andi a hug, and went home.
But... as I neglected to say, I got her info a little earlier ;)